Have you ever felt like your heart got ripped out and that there should be no reason for you to feel that way. Maybe other than the fact that even though you are surrounded by so many people yet you feel as though you are standing there and no one sees you. All you want is for someone to care about you on a different level than what family and friends do. You see everyone else around in happy relationships but everyone you've been in seem to just disintegrate in front of you, even when you try you're hardest to fix them or to keep them going. All you want is a family of your own and to feel like you found your niche in life, but it seems as though that time seems to just be speeding past you. One guy I like I feel like he's avoiding me, we make plans and then when the day those plans come up he always seems to have excuses lately. Is it so bad all I want is to hang out with people that I don't live with. I feel as though this cabin fever is going to slowly eat me away from the inside. I just want to hit rewind and go back to a few years, break my contract I had before I had even left for boot camp and seen where that brought me to now.
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